OMG Gamp

[Jessie]

Last night, I made Turkey Bacon for Timothy for dinner and I'd never had it before.  When I first started cooking it, and it smelled like fried bologna, I lost hope.  Then, magically, it started smelling and looking like bacon!  I ate a piece, and damn!  I think I like it MORE than regular bacon.  It was crisp evenly all over and didn't have any left over curvy fat like regular bacon and didn't leave me feeling all fat and greasy.

Mmm, Turkey Bacon!

(It's still no ham)

[swolt]

My dad fries turkey's for Thanksgiving and Christmas and I love love love to pick the skin off. It's my favorite part.

How does one make turkey bacon?

[Jessie]

You buy turkey bacon and then you cook it.

Deep fried turkey is the shit.  Yummmy.

[Gamplayerx]

Turkey bacon is okay, but it's not bacon bacon. 

[Bennyhana]

Turkey bacon is okay, but I've never had turkey bacon that got pleasantly crisp without being burnt.

[dots]

http://www.flickr.com/groups/everythingsbetterwithbacon/

A group devoted to bacon.

[Gamplayerx]

http://www.flickr.com/groups/everythingsbetterwithbacon/

A group devoted to bacon.

Weird.  There's  386 Members and 14 posts.

[ReBurn]

http://www.flickr.com/groups/everythingsbetterwithbacon/

A group devoted to bacon.

Weird.  There's  386 Members and 14 posts.

Most of the members have really greasy fingers, so they can't post.

[JJ]

I don't get the uber fascination with bacon that some folks have. It's just bacon! It's salty and smoky.

...it's a meat. It really isn't all that exciting! Tasty yes, but gawd...folks in Fark threads act like...well, children of course, but...they place it high in their ant-farm memes du jour.

I study the NITE KREW threads in the mornings, and there's always some kind of fetish bullshit that they are going on and on about. Which is interesting, I participated in and watched the creation of NK because Night Crew was so stupid and overridden with bloggers and that crazy bitch. Nite Krew started out super cool with all these cool photoshops, then all the hardcore dorks moved in, and now it's just as gay as night crew was, but less creepy and antisocial.

End fragment rant.

OFF TO THE JMOBILE WHOOSH

[dazie]

nite krew = bacon haters?

[JJ]

nite krew = bacon haters?

No.

It is a periodic childish obsession for them not unlike "not wearing pants" or going "WOOO" or just generally being weird-ass internet forum mavens with absolutely no social lives in real life.

[dazie]

nite krew = bacon haters?

No.

It is a periodic childish obsession for them not unlike "not wearing pants" or going "WOOO" or just generally being weird-ass internet forum mavens with absolutely no social lives in real life.

and these people are your contemporaries?

[Gamplayerx]

What's the different between Night Crew, Nite Krew and the LOO?

[JJ]

nite krew = bacon haters?

No.

It is a periodic childish obsession for them not unlike "not wearing pants" or going "WOOO" or just generally being weird-ass internet forum mavens with absolutely no social lives in real life.

and these people are your contemporaries?

Forget I mentioned it. That will reduce the aggregate number of questions I don't know are serious or otherwise.

[JJ]

What's the different between Night Crew, Nite Krew and the LOO?

There is no more NC. It died because it was a huge pile of suck. Now the hardcores from there have moved into NK.

I have no idea what LOO is but it's the same obese hardcores in all those threads.

[JJ]

Threadjack:

OK there's this super morbidly obese guy here at work. Crazy crazy fat and has grown in the last year and a half. Seeing his food plates and eating habits (eats a whole blue steak gristle, fat, and all, 2 glasses of chocolate milk, etc etc, snacks on candy all day) makes it pretty abundantly clear why he's obese.

Last week I noticed him saying a quick grace to himself before eating, which I never have noticed before, probably because I avoid him because he's a "difficult person."

I thought that it was odd that this super super fat gluttonous man was saying grace and thanking his concept of a universal spirit for the food he was about to eat.

[Gamplayerx]

Maybe he is truly grateful.

Or maybe he was praying for magic food.  Or a tragic accident to befall you.

[JJ]

Maybe he is truly grateful.

Or maybe he was praying for magic food.  Or a tragic accident to befall you.

I don't doubt he was grateful...but he must have been grateful for an awful lot of food is what I'm getting at.

...he's super lazy though so that doesn't help.

[Bennyhana]

There are people who pray right before they push the button to detonate a backpack full of expolsives on a crowded bus, too. 

People like to think God's behind them in whatever they do, be it gorging themselves with food, blowing up innocent children (either with a backpack or from an airplane), or purchasing electronics.  It's probably the strongest argument for atheism I've heard.

[Jessie]

Some people just say grace.

[JJ]

Good points Benny.

Grace actually originated from people seeing monks holding their hands near plates to do an energy visualization exercise that infused "chi/ki/prana/universal life energy" back into the food. Food loses its life energy about a half hour after being picked, and doing the energy visualization can replenish it.

[Gamplayerx]

Good points Benny.

Grace actually originated from people seeing monks holding their hands near plates to do an energy visualization exercise that infused "chi/ki/prana/universal life energy" back into the food. Food loses its life energy about a half hour after being picked, and doing the energy visualization can replenish it.

See?  Magic food.

[dazie]

I went out to dinner last week with my friend Bob's family.  Now- Bob is the evil twin. Really- he has a twin brother.  Bob drinks, he smokes (all sorts of things) he lives with his girlfriend (OMG-WEDLOCK!) he messes around...  Anyway- before we dug in to our food, his dad said something along the lines of "We'll say grace" and they all repeated this prayer.  Even Bob.  I was stunned and expected lightning.

There was lightning, just not in the restaurant.

[Jessie]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

[dazie]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

[BigDun]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

[dazie]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

Why do you have to say God Bless YOu?

[Jessie]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

I just say, "Bless You."  That way they can be blessed by whomever they'd prefer.

[ReBurn]

What does turkey bacon have to do with prayer and sneezing?

Threadjack and a half.

[BigDun]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

I just say, "Bless You."  That way they can be blessed by whomever they'd prefer.

I have neglected to say "Bless you" when someone sneezed and gotten reprimanded for my lack of courtesy.

IT'S A HOLD OVER FROM THE TIME WHEN PEOPLE WERE AFRAID YOU WOULD LOOSE YOUR SOUL WHEN SNEEZING FOR PETE'S SAKE!

I think that sneezes, like farts, should just be overlooked as if they had never occurred.

FYI- This threadjack shows true art.

[ReBurn]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

I just say, "Bless You."  That way they can be blessed by whomever they'd prefer.

I have neglected to say "Bless you" when someone sneezed and gotten reprimanded for my lack of courtesy.

IT'S A HOLD OVER FROM THE TIME WHEN PEOPLE WERE AFRAID YOU WOULD LOOSE YOUR SOUL WHEN SNEEZING FOR PETE'S SAKE!

I think that sneezes, like farts, should just be overlooked as if they had never occurred.

FYI- This threadjack shows true art.

You have to say 'Bless You" around here or old ladies start hitting you with stuff.

[Jessie]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

I just say, "Bless You."  That way they can be blessed by whomever they'd prefer.

I have neglected to say "Bless you" when someone sneezed and gotten reprimanded for my lack of courtesy.

IT'S A HOLD OVER FROM THE TIME WHEN PEOPLE WERE AFRAID YOU WOULD LOOSE YOUR SOUL WHEN SNEEZING FOR PETE'S SAKE!

I think that sneezes, like farts, should just be overlooked as if they had never occurred.

FYI- This threadjack shows true art.

Man, when I was flying around last week, I was in the front row in one of my flights.  Someone went in the bathroom and did something godawful, and everyone just pretended like it wasn't there.  My eyes were watering. 

[ReBurn]

I bow my head and say amen and stuff when people pray around me.

Ditto.

I have to remind myself to say "God Bless You" when someone sneezes. I prefer to say Gesundheit.

I just say, "Bless You."  That way they can be blessed by whomever they'd prefer.

I have neglected to say "Bless you" when someone sneezed and gotten reprimanded for my lack of courtesy.

IT'S A HOLD OVER FROM THE TIME WHEN PEOPLE WERE AFRAID YOU WOULD LOOSE YOUR SOUL WHEN SNEEZING FOR PETE'S SAKE!

I think that sneezes, like farts, should just be overlooked as if they had never occurred.

FYI- This threadjack shows true art.

Man, when I was flying around last week, I was in the front row in one of my flights.  Someone went in the bathroom and did something godawful, and everyone just pretended like it wasn't there.  My eyes were watering. 

Better to let it out and bear the shame than hold it in and bear the pain.

[Beefy]

The front row has more leg room.

[ReBurn]

The front row has more leg room.

And according to my experience 86.3% more drunks.

[Alice]

God, I hate when fat people pray.  Fat people = worthless.  So worthless in fact, that I just consider anyone online that I don't care for a fat person.  It just makes sense to me.

[Beefy]

God, I hate when fat people pray.  Fat people = worthless.  So worthless in fact, that I just consider anyone online that I don't care for a fat person.  It just makes sense to me.

Why?  Does the friction between their meaty hands create a smell that is unpleasant to your olfactory senses?

[Alice]

God, I hate when fat people pray.  Fat people = worthless.  So worthless in fact, that I just consider anyone online that I don't care for a fat person.  It just makes sense to me.

Why?  Does the friction between their meaty hands create a smell that is unpleasant to your olfactory senses?

Sure.  Let's go with that.

[swolt]

God, I hate when fat people pray.  Fat people = worthless.  So worthless in fact, that I just consider anyone online that I don't care for a fat person.  It just makes sense to me.

Why?  Does the friction between their meaty hands create a smell that is unpleasant to your olfactory senses?

Sure.  Let's go with that.

I can't believe you said that. I'm fat, and that hurts. Being fat is not a choice, it's a di...

oh shit, I'm out of breath. I gotta go lay down.

[Beefy]

The ghost of William Howard Taft sheds a tear.  And then eats a whole ethereal chocolate pie in one bite.