Maury

[Gamplayerx]

I've only seen this show about 5 times, and every single time it's paternity tests.  It just came on, and guess what the topic is.  C'mon.  Guess.

[ReBurn]

Fear of midgets?

[Gamplayerx]

Haha!  Kind of. 

[DownSouth]

It used to be good years ago, now it's all "Who my baby daddy?".

[Beefy]

I love Maury and his exploiting the trash of America.  Every episode is like a sideshow.  At least he's honest about what he's doing, like Jerry Springer is.

[Gamplayerx]

Today's show is titled "I'm testing the 10th man ... will I find the father today?"

[ReBurn]

If that was a guy people would be high-fiving him and and saying "dude."  I bet someone calls her a slut before the episode ends.

[Gamplayerx]

Interesting side note:  a friend of mine met her biological father yesterday.

[BigDun]

Did she meet him on the Maury show?

[ReBurn]

Did she ever meet him at all?

[Gamplayerx]

She didn't meet him on the Maury show.  She had lived with him until she was 2, when her mother died of a brain tumor and he supposedly fell apart and had a nervous breakdown or something and her maternal grandparents adopted her.

[ReBurn]

Did she ever meet him at all?

WTF?  Where is my head today?

[Beefy]

Did she ever meet him at all?

WTF?  Where is my head today?

http://www.youtube.com/v/5Er6Qa-04j4

[Gamplayerx]

Did she ever meet him at all?

WTF?  Where is my head today?

http://www.youtube.com/v/5Er6Qa-04j4

I love that.  Did anyone else ever watch Kingdom Hospital?

[Beefy]

Not I.  I still would like to make it through the original Danish TV series The Kingdom, which "inspired" Mr. King.

[eo000]

Did she meet him on the Maury show?

reuniting is more of a "montell" thing.

[DownSouth]

Montel is the worst.  Remember when he put on some muscle and started shopping in the kiddie section for shirts.

[dazie]

Did she meet him on the Maury show?

reuniting is more of a "montell" thing.

A friend of mine met his birth mom and sisters on Maury...

[meredith]

maury also does a "guess the gender" show on occasion

[Gamplayerx]

I lost interest in Maury.  I wonder if #10 was the daddy.

[Alice]

My co-worker had her baby yesterday.  He was born on the same day as her first child - in fact, she went into labor at Chuck E Cheese during her daughter's 1st birthday party

[Gamplayerx]

Peepants had a baby?!?

[Alice]

Peepants had a baby?!?

No.  Tammi had a baby.  Peepants is too old.

[Gamplayerx]

Poor Peepants. 

[Alice]

Poor Peepants. 

Oh!  Now that I have a camera phone, I need to take a picture to show you how close to eachother we sit.

[Gamplayerx]

Poor Peepants. 

Oh!  Now that I have a camera phone, I need to take a picture to show you how close to eachother we sit.

You need to do a lot more than that!

[Alice]

Poor Peepants. 

Oh!  Now that I have a camera phone, I need to take a picture to show you how close to eachother we sit.

You need to do a lot more than that!

What else do I need to do?

[Gamplayerx]

Poor Peepants. 

Oh!  Now that I have a camera phone, I need to take a picture to show you how close to eachother we sit.

You need to do a lot more than that!

What else do I need to do?

Did we ever get better hair pictures?  No.  Have we seen the new car?  No.  Skinned xbox?  No.  Um, I'm sure there's more. 

[Alice]

Poor Peepants. 

Oh!  Now that I have a camera phone, I need to take a picture to show you how close to eachother we sit.

You need to do a lot more than that!

What else do I need to do?

Did we ever get better hair pictures?  No.  Have we seen the new car?  No.  Skinned xbox?  No.  Um, I'm sure there's more. 

Hahaha - I'll work on it.  I need to get a haircut again.  It's been too long.

[Gamplayerx]

Now?

[Alice]

Now?

My hair is up, my car is covered in snow, and the whore is downstairs by the Xbox. 

Tomorrow.

[Gamplayerx]

Take it down, sweep it off, hire a hit man.

Sheesh.  Do I have to do all the thinking here?

[dc]

Take it down, sweep it off, hire a hit man.

Sheesh.  Do I have to do all the thinking here?

Simplify.  Fire is the cleanser.  It would solve all three problems.

[Alice]

Take it down, sweep it off, hire a hit man.

Sheesh.  Do I have to do all the thinking here?

Post a bikini pic tonight, and I'll take the pictures tonight.   

[Gamplayerx]

Take it down, sweep it off, hire a hit man.

Sheesh.  Do I have to do all the thinking here?

Post a bikini pic tonight, and I'll take the pictures tonight.   

You're up, babe. 

[Alice]

You know what I meant - you don't get off by using semantics.   

[ReBurn]

It takes much more effort than semantics.

[Gamplayerx]

I'm a lucky girl.  Semantics so does it for me.

Oh, oh!!

[dazie]

You know what I meant - you don't get off by using semantics.   

How come you're anti-semantic?  Does Gamp know?

My co-worker had her baby yesterday.  He was born on the same day as her first child - in fact, she went into labor at Chuck E Cheese during her daughter's 1st birthday party

OK- I'm still a little dazed this morning.  I thought you meant that she'd had twins.  "he was born on the same day as her first child."  I thought- aren't most twins born on the same day?

[Beefy]

WHERE ARE THE PICS?

[Alice]

Here's my office:



The car and hair and Xbox have to wait til I'm home.

[Beefy]

Looks stuffy.

[Alice]

Looks stuffy.

Yeah, it sucks.  We're so close together with no seperation to speak of.

[Bennyhana]

Looks stuffy.

Yeah, it sucks.  We're so close together with no seperation to speak of.

It must smell bad.

[Beefy]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

[Bennyhana]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

Being that close to her, it'd be hard NOT to find out.

[Alice]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

She coughed so hard, she pissed her chair.  I could smell it and see it.

[Beefy]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

She coughed so hard, she pissed her chair.  I could smell it and see it.

That's like sharting yourself in front of others.  How mortified she must have been.

[Alice]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

She coughed so hard, she pissed her chair.  I could smell it and see it.

That's like sharting yourself in front of others.  How mortified she must have been.

Yeah, it was pretty bad.  I was a little... out of it that day too.

[Gamplayerx]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

She coughed so hard, she pissed her chair.  I could smell it and see it.

That's like sharting yourself in front of others.  How mortified she must have been.

Yeah, it was pretty bad.  I was a little... out of it that day too.

Haha, just a little!

[Bennyhana]

Why did she pee her pants again and how did you find out about it?

She coughed so hard, she pissed her chair.  I could smell it and see it.

That's like sharting yourself in front of others.  How mortified she must have been.

Yeah, it was pretty bad.  I was a little... out of it that day too.

I blame the ammonia fumes.