Got any Chemistry Questions?

[nallen]

Got any?  I'll answer them for you.  really. 

[dc]

Why won't oil and water mix?

[cnamon]

How do you make magic plastic and what does it retail for?

[eo000]

how come some people get married, and then divorce, claiming that there just wasn't any chemistry?

[dc]

Why do chemists wear white lab coats?

[Gamplayerx]

Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime you are near?

Is it true that if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate?

Hey!  I found a funny joke:

How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker?
None. That's what organic chemists are for!

Hahahaha!

[cnamon]

Where do babies come from?

[nallen]

Why won't oil and water mix?

The hydrogen bonds between water molecules are stronger than the bonds to the oil, which can only interact through dispersion forces.  Teh water molecules force the oil out.

[Gamplayerx]

Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime you are near?

Is it true that if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate?

Hey!  I found a funny joke:

How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker?
None. That's what organic chemists are for!

Hahahaha!

Hey, nate!  Wash any beakers lately?  

Hahahaha.

[nallen]

How do you make magic plastic and what does it retail for?

Very carefully using a Pd catalyst.  It will retail for aproximately $0.60/lb.

[nallen]

how come some people get married, and then divorce, claiming that there just wasn't any chemistry?

This is what happens when people fail organic chemistry, they end up as failures in life as well.  Study hard...

[nallen]

Why do chemists wear white lab coats?

They are a) cheaper b) easier to clean and c) the good guys always wear white.

[nallen]

Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime you are near?

Is it true that if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate?

Hey!  I found a funny joke:

How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker?
None. That's what organic chemists are for!

Hahahaha!

Because I sugary sweet, duh.

Yes.

[nallen]

Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime you are near?

Is it true that if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate?

Hey!  I found a funny joke:

How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker?
None. That's what organic chemists are for!

Hahahaha!

Hey, nate!  Wash any beakers lately? 

Hahahaha.

That's what hours 11 am to 1:30pm were spend doing in the Allen Laboratory.

[Gamplayerx]

I know that you were washing beakers today.  That's why the joke was even funnier!

[cnamon]

If I wanted to make play dough, what would the process be?

[nallen]

If I wanted to make play dough, what would the process be?

Take flour mix with water,a nd add a bunch of salt. mix with food coloring of your choice.

[cnamon]

What is your favorite element and why?

[nallen]

I know that you were washing beakers today.  That's why the joke was even funnier!

Tease.  I should have known.

[nallen]

What is your favorite element and why?

Currently it is Thulium, it has a beautiful emerald green color in tetrahydrofuran solution as it's divalent iodide salt.

Also it's supposedly totally useless.

and i did my PhD on it's chemistry.

[cnamon]

How long have you studied chemistry?  What made you choose that field?  Have you ever burnt the hair off your arm?

[Gamplayerx]

Ask about his eyebrows!!

[nallen]

How long have you studied chemistry?  What made you choose that field?  Have you ever burnt the hair off your arm?

Since I was 16, so 14 years.

I wanted to learn how to make my own glazes for ceramics or paint.  I took chemistry, it was hella fun.

yes.  but not in chemistry, that would be thanks to my oxy-acetylene torch.

[nallen]

Ask about his eyebrows!!

I haven't burnt them ALL the way off!  Thankyouverymuch.

[DownSouth]

Are you dating Les or just a fuck buddy?

[eo000]

Are you dating Les or just a fuck buddy?

Do you ever let Sheng Sheng join in, or is he just the camera man?

[DownSouth]

I thought Sheng Sheng was the pimp.

[nallen]

Are you dating Les or just a fuck buddy?

Are you lookin' for a date?

[Gamplayerx]

Do ph and alkaline fall under the umbrella of organic chemistry?  'Cause we're opening the pool soon and I've got questions!

[nallen]

Do ph and alkaline fall under the umbrella of organic chemistry?  'Cause we're opening the pool soon and I've got questions!

Sure does.  pH is the -log of the hydrogen cation concentration, Alkaline is a pH greater than neutral, which is pH=7.

[Gamplayerx]

Do ph and alkaline fall under the umbrella of organic chemistry?  'Cause we're opening the pool soon and I've got questions!

Sure does.  pH is the -log of the hydrogen cation concentration, Alkaline is a pH greater than neutral, which is pH=7.

Okay.  Here's basically the sum and substance of my knowledge.  Johnson's baby shampoo doesn't sting your eyes because it's the same ph as your eyes.  Which also means that it's really not good for your hair because it strips it or something.  So, I have these test strips for the pool and I'm supposed to keep the chlorine making the chlorine test pad purple and the ph making the ph test pad orange and the alkaline making the alkaline test pad green.  But what does that mean?

[nallen]

Do ph and alkaline fall under the umbrella of organic chemistry?  'Cause we're opening the pool soon and I've got questions!

Sure does.  pH is the -log of the hydrogen cation concentration, Alkaline is a pH greater than neutral, which is pH=7.

Okay.  Here's basically the sum and substance of my knowledge.  Johnson's baby shampoo doesn't sting your eyes because it's the same ph as your eyes.  Which also means that it's really not good for your hair because it strips it or something.  So, I have these test strips for the pool and I'm supposed to keep the chlorine making the chlorine test pad purple and the ph making the ph test pad orange and the alkaline making the alkaline test pad green.  But what does that mean?

pH for a pool should be between 7.2-7.6, ideally 7.4-7.6, the indicator used is typically phenol red, and you just need to get the color right.

Free chlorine is the oxidative potential of the water from free chlorine (or hypochlorite) aka sanitizer.  This is what does the killing of the nasties, be sure to add it in the evening because the sun light will break it down before it has a chance to kill everything.  Too high and it will destroy your hair real nice like. 

Alkaline level is not actually pH related in this case, rather it is the hardness of the water.  This is actually related to the pH, if the water is too soft, meaning it doesn't have many alkaline earth metals in it (we're talking Calcium here really)  If it's too low the water will leach calcium out of the concrete that makes up the pool.  That would be bad in the long run don't ya think?  You just need a high enough hardness (aka alkaline) to keep that from happening.  If your water comes from wells (that is the munciple water supply) chances are it's plenty hard. 

[Gamplayerx]

We have a well.  Our water is nasty and very high in calcium and iron.  But we don't put that in the pool if we can help it.  We get city water trucked in or hope for rain.

[nallen]

We have a well.  Our water is nasty and very high in calcium and iron.  But we don't put that in the pool if we can help it.  We get city water trucked in or hope for rain.

I thought you lived in a city?  But this is something a country dweller would say.  I am the confused.  Do you have that neat electricity we all talk so much about?

[ReBurn]

Is it difficult to manufacture crystal meth?  And are there any other good side jobs for a chemist?

[Gamplayerx]

We have a well.  Our water is nasty and very high in calcium and iron.  But we don't put that in the pool if we can help it.  We get city water trucked in or hope for rain.

I thought you lived in a city?  But this is something a country dweller would say.  I am the confused.  Do you have that neat electricity we all talk so much about?

I live in a city.  A small city.  But my community didn't tie in to the city water, so we all have wells.  We have public sewer, though.  Basically about 2 blocks away, they have city water.  I miss city water.  Wells suck.  At least, wells that aren't up in the Rockies or something suck.  Did I mention that I don't care for wells?  'Cause I don't!

[Gamplayerx]

Did you know that if you type the word wells enough it starts to look funny? 

I now realize that neither this post nor my previous post contained a chemistry question, so, um, what's the atomic weight of thulium?

[nallen]

Is it difficult to manufacture crystal meth?  And are there any other good side jobs for a chemist?

It's easy!  Take a bunch of sudefed, and react it with some thionyl chloride, reduce it with your favorite hydride source, and acidify.  Bob's your Uncle!

There are always good side jobs in the neighborhood for a creative and discreate chemist.

[nallen]

Did you know that if you type the word wells enough it starts to look funny? 

I now realize that neither this post nor my previous post contained a chemistry question, so, um, what's the atomic weight of thulium?

168.  Notice the AIM login?  thulium168?    Ain't I clever?

[Gamplayerx]

Hey!  You got a South Park avatar!  Yay!!!

Yes, you're very clever.  And sweet.  Sugary, in fact.

[nallen]

Hey!  You got a South Park avatar!  Yay!!!

Yes, you're very clever.  And sweet.  Sugary, in fact.

I figured it was time to get with the program.  I'm a slacker I know....

[Infobahn]

Lather, Rinse, Repeat?  Do you need to repeat?

[nallen]

Lather, Rinse, Repeat?  Do you need to repeat?

No.